Down on the Farm

The other day I heard someone say something about living in a one horse town. I haven't heard that expression for a while and it made me wonder where it...

The Olympics make me nervous. Most of the events are designed for heartbreak. Those poor kids leave home, practice for years, live like monks, win the months of qualifying rounds--only...

Every so often, the rules of conversational English need to be updated. When I find out who actually writes the rules, I am going to submit the following suggestions: No...

The spirit of the Olympics, it is said, is to compete honorably and do the best you can. It is too late for me to compete in the current Olympiad,...

These are the dog days of summer. The term "dog days" dates from ancient times and has to do with the stellar constellations which are prominent in the night sky...

The tradition of a fair goes back to Roman times, when the authorities would declare an intermission of labor and tradesmen from afar sold their wares. In the Middle Ages,...

As my hometown of Fertile celebrated its 125th anniversary last weekend, I found myself in a goofy outfit out in the cemetery playing the role of one of the town's...

A recent survey showed people dread hosting a party even more than they dread a job interview. Not surprising. Just look at the somersaults parents turn to get the basement...

As a notorious abuser of children is put away in Pennsylvania, many turn their rage towards those who must have known kids were being hurt, but who did little or...

Never thought I'd see the day, but there I was last week yelling at the television, "Good grief man, get a haircut!" The target of my outburst, who will never...

Summer is for reunions of all sorts. My 30-year high school class reunion is in July. Because I am one of the locals planning the event, I will likely show...

Somewhere, somehow, the idea arose that doing something for a long, long time without stopping is a good way to raise money. Probably because it works. First, there were Labor...

"People are late because they want to be late," concludes Dr. Irving Snerdpoof, Phd., in his recently-published study, "An Inquiry Into the Motivations of the Perpetually Tardy." The inspiration for...

Sometime this month, every campus and high school across this great nation will host a celebration where somebody who has allegedly met with success in life will dispense advice to...

Across the road on the old Henry Helm place is a little twenty acre field which is now rented by the Amish. Seventy years ago, Henry, who didn't get his...